Why I am stepping away from the Evangelical Church
Man, what a title right? If I was trying to get someone’s attention, I think that did it. Okay, the first thing you have to understand is this is the result of the perfect storm that has been brewing for many years. So let’s dive into this one.
Disclaimer: It may feel like I speak in generalizations a lot, I sort of do. If what I am generalizing about doesn’t apply to you, consider yourself exempt and move on.
First of all: yes, it has not been that long since I stopped working for a church, and no, all of this hasn’t suddenly happened between that day and now. As I said, this is the result of years upon years of the perfect storm. I am an evidence guy like I need to see the proof of something to believe it. That also means that if the facts don’t line up for me, I cannot accept it. “The sky is blue.” Okay, easy enough. Confer with other trusted individuals to establish what the color blue even is. Once I have established that then I look once again to the sky, and if it is in line with what I have determined from trusted sources that blue is, I now believe and agree that the sky is blue.
“You can not experience a good happy marriage outside of Christ.” “You can not be truly free or happy if you are not living your life in accordance with scripture.” Well, now we have problems. I have plenty of personal experience to contradict these statements; combined with input from my trusted sources, I can not accept your statements as fact. Because I can not accept them as fact, I can not live by them or expect others to live by them.
This brings me to my second point/problem/reason: the Evangelical Church and Christians simply can not accept that there is another way of thinking, and everyone/everything must comply with their way. The arrogance of this is astounding. Take the issue of abortions or Pro-Life. I firmly believe a woman should have control of her own body, and this includes abortion. Just because you want abortions to be illegal won’t make abortions go away; it will just make them less safe and a greater health risk to the woman. So that isn’t Pro-Life; that is just Anti-Abortion. At the same time, yes, I would love to never see an abortion ever again, but that simply is not reality. One-sided arguments and positions that do not take all involved into consideration are very ignorant. The display of hatred and damnation displayed by Evangelicals towards these women is appalling.
And now we are onto my third point/problem/reason: Evangelicals are filled with such vile and hatred towards those who do not subscribe to the same views, opinions, and beliefs as them. Let’s take this month of June, for example, Pride Month. It is the Evangelical Christians who come out in force to be downright nasty to anyone in the LGBTQ+ community and especially to those who claim to be Christian and support the LGBTQ+ community. Now I will never pretend for even a second to be oppressed or persecuted for my position when I have heard the stories and grieved over the pain the LGBTQ+ community experiences. Still, I have personally received a lot of negativity for the position and stance I have had this month. The only thing I have done this month is understand better the struggles and experiences of the LGBTQ+ community and share what I have learned. Yes, I met a lot of resistance when I challenged the Bible’s position on homosexuality. The awesome thing is that is my belief, and I am allowed to have it just as much as you are allowed to believe the opposite; we just need to be able to do it without jumping down each other's throats.
The struggle for me is this: one side is arguing, demeaning, vile, hateful, and discriminatory, and the other side is loving, caring, accepting, and supportive. One side is the Evangelical Christian. One side is not.
In conclusion: it is always good to challenge what you believe in; if you don’t, do you truly know what you believe in? One question I have been wrestling with lately is: what if I am wrong?
This is not me walking away from God or compromising my faith. This is me walking away from an organized institution that I can not align with right now.
I am sharing my journey with you and invite you to come along with me in this journey.
Reading Recommendation:
When Narcissism Comes to Church
This book will wreck you, especially if you have been involved with any “behind the scenes” church/ministry work.
Highly recommend.